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Rantings of a Crazed Soccer Mom
Wednesday, 27 October 2004
The State of Marriage
I know all about marriage. I have one. I've been married to my husband Nigel for eight and a half years.

Of course, when I say I know all about marriage, really the only marriage I know about is my own. I've never been married to anyone else, so as far as I'm concerned, marriage is a bit like being stuck in an oddball British comedy. Mostly, though it's like going into business with a drinking buddy. A lot more work and not near as much fun. But if you're lucky, you still like each other.

Here's something I've noticed about marriage. My reasonably good marriage has absolutely no effect on anyone else's marriage. The couple next door to us got divorced, our example did them no good. The couple across the street are still married but I'm sure we have nothing to do with that.

About the only person our marriage does affect is our daughter, and hopefully in a positive way.

So if two men in San Francisco or two women in Boston get a marriage license, it's not going to make a bit of difference in my marriage or anyone else's. Basically, the flap about gay marriage comes down to another case of self-appointed moral people wanting to boss other people around.

In March of 1996, I was working a full time job in Mason, Ohio, commuting from our home in Aurora, Indiana, a good hour and fifteen minute drive one way. My six month old daughter made the trip with me four days a week, spending eight hours in daycare. I wasn't about to quit though. That job was my security. If Nigel left, I would need it to provide for myself and my daughter.

Then Nigel suggested we get married. He didn't think my working was good for the baby. I'd be covered under his insurance and I'd be assured that I'd be taken care of no matter what. It was a no brainer. We were married a month later.

I'm sure there are plenty of gay couples in our situation, women or men with small children who want to stay home and care for them, but must go through all kinds of legal rigamarole to get the same rights I got with a marriage license and a short ceremony. I have rights to his property, I'm the first person called if he's in an accident, I'm covered under his insurance, and I can refer to him as "my husband" instead of "my boyfriend" which sounds so ridiculous when you're past 40.

I don't expect gay marriage to become the law of the land. But if it does, marriage as an institution won't change, one way or the other. Nigel anad I will still be married, although the couple across the street may not be. It's a contract between individuals, and nobody else's business.

Posted by judy5cents at 12:15 PM EDT
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Sunday, 24 October 2004
Your Nichols' Worth
Now Playing: Vote Early and Often
Hi, I'm Judy Nichols. Welcome to my rant.

I am a Democrat. I am a Liberal Democrat. I believe that nobody has the right to boss other people around because they believe they have a monopoly on morality. Also I believe that poverty is not the result of a a defective character and it's the responsibility of all of us to improve the condition of our fellow human beings.

I live in North Carolina which has the option of voting early. Since my polling place is an elementary school with a huge parking problem, I figure I'll avoid the lines and vote tomorrow. Also, since I intend to drive voters to the polls, this will give me more time to do that.

Now people ask me what if something happens to change your mind? Well, Mr. Bush has had four years to do that, and my opinion of him has only gotten worse during that time.

However, I have thought about what he could say to change my mind about him and here it is:

"My fellow Americans. Gee, I'm really sorry, I made mistake. In fact, I made a whole mess of mistakes. The war was wrong. I screwed up on that. And I screwed up on the environment, the patriot act, homeland security, stem cell research and education. I'm firin' Donald Rumsfeld, Dick Cheney, and John Ashcroft. My administration won't be a bastion of secrecy any more. From now on we'll tell you what we're doin.

And you know what--those born again crazies who keep saying how moral I am? They're really gettin' on my nerves. You holier-than-thou folks can kiss my ass. Well, see ya, I'm going out for a beer. I got some catchin' up to do."

Now what could make me change my mind on John Kerry? He's found in bed with a dead woman and a live boy. And a priest. And Tom Delay. But I'd still be willing to believe there was a logical explanation, like they were all taking a sauna, the woman passed out, they dragged her to the nearby hotel room to give her CPR.

Of course, neither one of these things are going to happen in the next week. Bush will continue to shore up his base by calling Kerry a Massachusetts Liberal
And Kerry will probably say something stupid which will be all over the networks. But none of that will change my mind.

And don't you let it change yours either.

Practice compassionate regime change

Posted by judy5cents at 12:32 PM EDT
Updated: Monday, 25 October 2004 8:04 AM EDT
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